At Home, Arlington, Massachusetts
I am ok. And I am going to be ok. I have a lot to work through, but I am going to be ok.
I need to repent of how I'm dealing with Trey. He really is sick. He was crying this morning when he woke up because he feels so bad and is frightened. This has just been really sucky timing for him to be so sick while I'm going through all of the emotions of a pregnancy “scare.” I love him and I need to try to be there for him. After all, he has been trying so hard to do the same for me.
About the Project
This is a very personal project. It tracks my growth and development as I journeyed toward motherhood over the recent years. It doesn't document every experience I had, and probably neglects my more joyful and peaceful moments in the frenzy of trying to communicate my fears, anxieties, and doubts. If you are a friend or loved one, please do not let anything you read here overshadow what you know of me personally. If you are a stranger, please remember that a living and flawed person stands behind these words. To all my guests here, please understand these are not political statements and try to extend me grace, even as I share my failures and foibles - I have repented of much of what I share. I don't share this journal as an exemplar, but rather out of the desire to share my hope that entrance to motherhood does not need to be a fearful thing - despite the very real fears I have fought against. Motherhood is simply a part of life and one through which I am discovering more of myself and my God.